Thursday, April 27, 2006

He's going to be really mad about this...Hee!

Today is Heir 2’s birthday. Heir 2 gets mad when I call him Heir 2, or even his posting name, Spicey McWhatever. So today, for his birthday, we’ll call him Joe.

Joe was born at 1:04 a.m. on April 27, 1991, in Winchester, Va. That makes him 15 today. That makes him nine months away from getting his learner’s permit. This will be the entire theme of his 15th year.

In case you haven’t gleaned this from previous posts, Joe is very smart and, more importantly (at least around here), very funny. But he’s not funny in the morning. Or smart. Or conscious.

Joe has a tendency to go into what we call “Monk Mode” every now and then, becoming obsessive about something stupid like alphabetizing, categorizing and cross-categorizing our DVDs. (When he was a toddler he used to sit in his car seat and count out loud until you screamed at him to stop already. Then he’d sit there, lips moving, still counting to himself. This worried other family members no end. ) We think he has moved on to other things, though his geometry homework sometimes looks like it’s been produced by a graphic artist and he tapes the hole punches on school papers.

When it comes to visits to the emergency room, Joe is the family leader. This is because he comes up with elaborate mechanical ideas I don’t find out about until after the fact, usually involving the garage roof and something with wheels. It worried me that perhaps the ER people would think he was abused or neglected, but one doctor assured me that he understood what it was like to raise “one of those kids.” (Though I’m glad we were able to extricate the Lite Brite from his nose without requiring an ER trip.)

Joe’s favorite hobby is playing guitar and he wants a bass for his combined birthday/report card present. I think he’s good at it, but I don’t know what he’s playing. It’s very loud and he’s very enthusiastic. He may even know one complete song by now.

I keep waiting for Joe to enter his “angsty teenage years,” but he’s pretty upbeat. Except in the morning. I cannot stress this enough.


Joe has great hair. Really. It’s fine. Leave it alone and go to school.

EDITOR’S ALERT: MammaK has taken the leap and has her own blog!

I am a Joe, sent by God.


Jagosaurus said...

Heh. Happy Birthday, Spicy McAdolescent.

White Trasherati said...

And your hair will be even more fabulous if you eat your Mom's carefully prepared homemade meals. Happy Birthday, Spicy McIngrate : )
(Seriously, happy b'day, and if you bug your parents enough they'll have you at the DMV in no time. Really. Just be persistent. Especially your mom - such a pushover.)

Jagosaurus said...

Spicy McIngrate ... Bwah!

White Trasherati said...

Ok, on the highchair tray - is that a gigantic slab of ham? Dang, Sisiggy, way to make your own baby they still eat like that? I don't think I'll be able to afford my two when they reach adolescence. Do you just heave a side of beef at them a few times a day?

sisiggy said...

Ya know, I've been looking at that picture for 12 years and it was just as I was scanning it that I noticed the slab of ham.

I hoping to God it was maybe Dirtman's plate and he put it down to take the picture.

Since I've not been cooking, I find it easier to throw a side of beef out the back door and let them all fight it out with the dogs. (I figure we can bet on them while we sit on the deck in the hot tub and drink wine. Repeat after me: "Oh, Wine Steward!"

Jagosaurus said...

Re the highchair photo: Does it bother anyone else that Barney seems to be mimicking Spicy McAdorable? That's creepy. Really creepy. Where is that Barney doll today because... I don't know. You might want to keep an eye on it.

I wasn't going to comment on the slab of ham the size of the child's torso. No sirree. Not a word about that gigantic piece of porkage....

White Trasherati said...

Your "wine stewards" are in occupied Virgina waiting for the damn house to get finished already.

Lifecruiser said...


Just the right details in here, which I'm sure a 15 years old is soooo grateful over ;-)

MammaK said...

Happy Birthday Joe. I hope you will recover from your mom's post in time for your 16th birthday!!! :-)))